tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post7795418169127269595..comments2023-09-22T07:47:54.317-04:00Comments on EF'M: The Life of an FSO Spouse: EFM: Evidence For MoodsDavid L.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16507045630471874296noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-26802142396145871612010-08-27T16:21:13.557-04:002010-08-27T16:21:13.557-04:00There is a course at FSI called "Realities of...There is a course at FSI called "Realities of Foreign Service Life" that is supposed to address some of these adaptation issues. Hope all EFMs will take it!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14795629388635834407noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-35211339630144073292010-08-22T23:24:45.813-04:002010-08-22T23:24:45.813-04:00I know the feeling man, it's amazing how you c...I know the feeling man, it's amazing how you can, on one hand feel like your normal happy self and on the other hand, at the same time feel totally frustrated about something as massively big as where you live. It gets easier! Your shipment arriving will be like Christmas and the language makes a huge difference. In China, I don't know what I would have done without a tutor for the last 4 months, it's not only learning the language, its a window into the culture around you. Hang in there!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-58390208023337274702010-08-21T02:27:22.618-04:002010-08-21T02:27:22.618-04:00I honestly think the idea to get a maid to help wi...I honestly think the idea to get a maid to help with language and culture is a good idea. Mi domestica is great to practice with. She understands I'm learning, so she tries to speak at my level. <br /><br />Also, my "honeymoon" period ended the day after I got here when I couldn't read any labels on the food. That was really upsetting and overwhelming for me. I think I started entering adaptation before my HHE arrived. It got even better after my car arrived. Now, with a job at the Embassy, good friends, and a firm grasp on where I live I feel completely adapted (especially with the driving!). I've been here for...well...tomorrow will be four months. Lucky you don't have to wait at all for the car - I'm so jealous!Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01741222609583042393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-40313116384911880092010-08-21T00:32:15.756-04:002010-08-21T00:32:15.756-04:00I think it'll help you learn Spanish if you re...I think it'll help you learn Spanish if you read or listen to something that naturally interests you, like a telenovela or a radio station or even a narco blog. Add in a source of exposure to your everyday life and your comprehension will improve a lot. Also get some Mexican friends, but of course that's a little harder.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18386641537435664951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-22074528926976758592010-08-20T22:24:57.148-04:002010-08-20T22:24:57.148-04:00I totally understand what you are going through. ...I totally understand what you are going through. After 2 months here I hit a big "depression" where everything about Mexico made me mad. I hated the driving especially. But now I'm finally in the "content" stage and just living life. You'll get there and hopefully you'll be able to enjoy mexico a little bit more. :)Brynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16632080239103256045noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-31311523098520390032010-08-20T21:32:41.492-04:002010-08-20T21:32:41.492-04:00For a non-cry for help this sure does seem a littl...For a non-cry for help this sure does seem a little like a cry for help! (And the notice to the family doesnt really lift the unsettling feeling of your brother saying I'm depressed-FYI) It sounds like your miserable :( Maybe you're just adjusting like the stupid chart says-Either way i think you really need to put yourself out there to make friends. Certainly there is some group on FACEBOOK that you could connect into. Even Boston was miserable for the first year I lived here since I didnt really know anyone (and i even spoke the language-kind of, could spend and extended amount of time outside, and had a coffee maker- speaking of which, why don't you go out and buy a new coffee pot and toaster? Neither of which are expensive Dave.) Bottom line, you have to meet people. It will make all the difference in the world.<br />I like the suggestion of getting the housekeeper to have someone to chat with throughout the day. I know it seems odd to us since mom and dad are a little more on the frugal/do it yourself kinda spectrum- but it seems like a good opportunity to learn a little more about he city and culture. I wish I had a great suggestion on how to spend your downtime around the house, but I really don't. <br /><br />Maybe you need a pep talk? I have two WKU friends in town this weekend but give me a call sometime next week and we can talk about how boring and uneventful our lives are.<br /><br />Hope you're doing well- even though it sounds like you're not. Tell Natalie I said hi,<br />BethElizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02854941795492712142noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-39236749801682577272010-08-20T05:51:36.757-04:002010-08-20T05:51:36.757-04:00My sentiments exactly, amigo. I too, failed to ma...My sentiments exactly, amigo. I too, failed to manage my expectations. In a bit of a tiff last week, C (my wife) asked me what it was I expected out of this experience, and I could not answer her. I suppose I thought finding work would be easier. I have never lived in a capitol city, and adjusting to living in a town of 5 million plus is a challenge, to say the least. However, now I know what it is like to "press 9 for English" :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-80060818643797073122010-08-19T20:18:02.402-04:002010-08-19T20:18:02.402-04:00I remember that chart from my days as an exchange ...I remember that chart from my days as an exchange student with AFS. They worked on a school year schedule and they had the same chart except with an up period around Thanksgiving (who doesn't love an American holiday centered around eating), then a low point around Christmas/New Year's (because it's not like back home), then another up in the spring and a down before they leave.<br /><br />You should also check out Culture Shock books, they have good advice on things you might be confused about. I am sure there is one for Mexico.alcanigliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15213250779201559019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-63094014296506666922010-08-19T18:56:29.852-04:002010-08-19T18:56:29.852-04:00I would like to put in a strong plug for a getting...I would like to put in a strong plug for a getting a part-time housekeeper. I know from following your blog that your initial reaction will be "no way!" but I think that it will really help with your current doldrums.<br /><br />Think of this as a person to practice a bit of Spanish with during the daytime... Someone you can go shopping with and learn about different items... Then come back to the house and cook something using fresh local ingredients, again while developing your Spanish.<br /><br />Living and working abroad in my pre-FS days when I had zero local language skills, I found that my housekeeper was a great guide into the local culture, food, and language. She told me funny stories about the neighbors and clued me in to local holidays, showed me how to eat items that I never would have picked up at the market/grocery, and was patient as I slowly developed my language skills.<br /><br />Even just for a few hours a week, I think that it's a worthwhile investment in your sanity. Find someone who meshes with your personality, then have fun with it!Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13186113760588444851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-53649640013042477182010-08-19T17:36:29.797-04:002010-08-19T17:36:29.797-04:00I don't know if I really agree with this chart...I don't know if I really agree with this chart. I agree that it is definitely a generalization. Oh well, I am sure people with advance degrees created this chart and it is something that has made the world a better place.Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17988224004955953763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-64245915646600659312010-08-19T17:28:05.774-04:002010-08-19T17:28:05.774-04:00I have to admit I can't picture what Hermosill...I have to admit I can't picture what Hermosillo is like at all. That many people but no tall buildings?A Walmart and Costco, but so few people speaking English that you're having trouble communicating? <br /><br />Get out there and take some pictures for us. I'm curious! Plus, that'll keep you busy for a bit! =)Alexhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11460126554831935552noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-41037161177079519382010-08-19T16:33:59.752-04:002010-08-19T16:33:59.752-04:00I have been thinking about you since I read that c...I have been thinking about you since I read that comment. Glad it wasn't a 'call for help'. I think identifying the issues and working to understand and resolve them is a good step...good luck.Bfileshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17657766918735380467noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6549445053733095568.post-25099623023522815892010-08-19T14:36:51.911-04:002010-08-19T14:36:51.911-04:00I had great success with FSI's distance learni...I had great success with FSI's distance learning Spanish program. They send you a CD with a computer program that was developed by FSI and is way better than the Stone and then you get 45 mins of telephone time with an FSI instructor every week. The classes are 14 weeks long and I think the next one starts mid-September. Search for "Spanish Intermediate" at fsi.state.gov on the intranet.Ryan Lockehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03203713329553258160noreply@blogger.com